Hello Stranger.

Don’t Talk to Strangers. 

Few weeks back I’ve discovered that my mind is little bit stuck. I was working with the same people every day, socialising with the same group of friends and, as much as I enjoy and adore all these people, I started feeling stuck in my way of thinking and doing things. As a result, I decided that it’s time to step out of the circle of people I know start talking to strangers. At least once a day.

Now… how do you approach strangers? Firstly, look around where you are. There are probably people in your own office whom you haven’t met yet – approach and introduce yourself. If you’re at home or out and about – you can always start chatting with your neighbours or the corner shop owner. Your hairdresser, taxi driver, receptionist, anyone really… You never know who you could meet and everyone has got an interesting story to share. There are also plenty of networking events you could go to, check out Eventbrite or Meetup.com to find a group of your liking. Having closer relationships with people in your society, as well as being part of interest groups or associations is what makes Danes the happiest nation on Earth after all. Worth trying!

Secondly – there are plenty of strangers out there on the internet. The benefit here is you can ‘screen’ them in the comfort of your own sofa while you browse through their social media profiles. I’m sure there are people who inspire you and you wish you could just talk to them and ask few questions. I’m sure there are people who’ve done things you would like to do in your career and life. People with skills compatible to yours. People with businesses you’d like to work for. Reach out to them – introduce yourself, explain why you’d like to talk to them. Most likely they wouldn’t mind spending half an hour on a call or Skype with you; or if you’re nearby, maybe you could even meet for a coffee? Some won’t respond at all, but it really doesn’t hurt to try.

So what have I achieved through approaching and talking with strangers? Well first of all – I have learnt loads, they suggested other people I should meet or places/resources I could learn more. Secondly, by providing different perspectives, they expand the way I think, which helps me to be more creative and more innovative. Most importantly – this way I have made some friends and met my mentors. Although, there’s still a long way till I meet and speak with all the people I want to, but I already feel more connected with my online network. I feel more inspired and motivated. I have a better clarity of where I want to go. Even today I had an ‘Eureka’ moment while speaking with one fascinating person I reached out to on LinkedIn – but that’s another story for another blog…

Me talking to strangers… 😉

It’s worth trying – forget what your mum told you about strangers and go, talk to them. Share your stories in comments.

Which brain wave are you on?

I learnt about brainwaves quite late in my life. Somehow we never covered them at school or at least I don’t remember. I was researching creativity and what makes us more creative than others, or why in some situations or time we are better at coming up with ideas. The famous ‘Eureka’ moment in a bathtub – is it true? And when I discovered the brainwaves , I had my own ‘A-ha!’ moment. I’m sure there’s plenty of scientific material on the web so what I’m going to share today is a rough summary of it and mostly my insights.

Alpha, Beta, Theta, Delta

First of all brainwaves are not to be mistaken with REM phases, this is a different topic. When we’re asleep our brain produces Delta waves. This is the state of unconsciousness. And you know that feeling before you fall asleep, when you’re drifting away but are still awake and conscious – this is when you’re in Theta. This phase doesn’t last too long, but it is definitely a moment of deep relaxation and creativity. Your brain is able to produce vivid visualizations and you might have some extraordinary thoughts. It’s useful to keep a notepad by your bed to write them down before you fall asleep. Theta can be also reached during deep meditation. You must have heard about all those ‘mind programming’ courses which promise to teach you a foreign language in a month or something like that – what they do is trying to induce Theta through relaxation so your brain can absorb more and you learn faster.

However, most important for us is to be aware of the brainwaves our brain produces during the waking hours : Alpha and Beta. Beta are the fast brainwaves and we on them most of the time during the day. They make us alert and logical, but they also makes us stressed and anxious. The moment we have enough, close our eyes, drift into daydreaming and just simply try to relax – our brain switches to Alpha frequency. This is when we’re creative – in Alpha we have a better imagination, generate more ideas, we can concentrate and we learn more. I hope that explains why you get ‘Eureka’ moments in a bathtub?

This was my breakthrough insight – you cannot be creative when you’re in Beta, no matter how hard you try. When you’re in highly demanding job, trying to meet deadlines, sales targets, juggling five things at once – you will not be creative. Sure, you will reach your targets, but you won’t come up with any innovative ideas. Understanding the effect of brainwaves on how our mind works made me realise:

1. You cannot just walk into a brainstorming meeting or creative workshops and expect everyone to throw ideas. You first have to help your team (and yourself) switch to Alpha. This is when, normally pointless to me, ‘small talk’ comes in handy. Help your team relax, crack a joke, talk about the weekend, last holidays, or anything else which will put people into a more relaxed phase. Lowering the brainwaves frequency even a little bit will help you to be more creative.

2. If you’re desperately trying to come up with a solution to a problem, or an idea – go on and have a bath. Or go for a walk. Or have a nap. Don’t feel bad for ‘wasting’ your time.

3. Meditate. Even if you’re not interested in spiritual aspects of it, it will help you to relax and be more creative. If you don’t know how, search for guided meditations on YouTube – there are plenty of helpful people who will talk you through it. I can recommend Calm – it’s a great website & app, which will help you relax in as little as 2 minutes.

You can thank me later 😉 Have a nice , relaxing day!

Photo credits: http://www.topnews.in/health/high-brain-waves-linked-better-memory-recall-212456